Every year when the deadlines to apply for school has passed, I felt a little twinge of regret. This year however, it's different.
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I have heard that there is talk again about having a midwife program and starting a birthing center within the Cree Nation. I have had harbored a lifelong love for childbirth and babies and for the longest time wanted to become a midwife myself.
The idea to become one came after the assistance of a Cree Traditional midwife to the birth of my first child. It was the late Sarah Ratt that had helped me and my labour to progress and no longer have the need to be medevac’d out of my community of Chisasibi to Rouyn, to have my first child. That was almost eighteen years ago and I eventually chose a different career path out of a need to support my family financially. I even left a well-established job almost ten years later in order to try to finally pursue my ambition to become a midwife. I took another college program that would help me have the proper prerequisites to enter a midwife program. Unfortunately, supporting a family and paying the bills on a student income became a burden which required me to put my dreams on hold once again. So I returned to my community in order to get my affairs in order and work off some of the bills again before considering continuing my studies. I came home holding two D.E.C.’s and a plan to go back in two years. It has been four years and the family is older. This means I can focus on my ambitions to become a midwife. My ambitions do not just stop there. I want to be first in line when it comes time to find recruits/suitable students and be the first applicant to the program. I want to be part of the first class of Cree women to be certified midwives. I want to graduate at the end of the program with Honors. I plan exactly to do that. I am confident I can succeed as a student to this program and reach the goals I set out for myself. My grades in my past educational stints prove that I am a dedicated student. The subject of Midwifery has fascinated me. I have not waited idly by when having to putting my plans on hold but instead, I have read up on the subject and purchased several different books on midwife practices. My experiences with a midwife did not stop at Ms. Ratt; I chose to have my son at the birthing center in Pointe Claire with a certified midwife. So the experiences of working with different midwives assisting in my first and last child birth are both good indicators that I will be a great candidate to the program. They have introduced me to a career that I know I will be passionate about and they have enforced this passion with the wonderful experiences of having them help me give birth to my eldest and to my youngest. It has come full circle for me as a mother and now I want it to come full circle for me career wise. I truly hope that the plans to help Cree candidates to attend a midwife program will happen sooner rather than later because I really would like to be part of the Cree Nation’s effort to implement a birthing center to cater to Cree women and women having children in the Cree territory. Either way, I will become a midwife, because I have been striving most of my life to do this. When I heard news about a recent decision to move trick-or-treating for tommorow night instead of Wednesday night like it's supposed to be in our community, my first question was why? When I found out it's because of a tournament being held in Val d'Or I immediately sprung into action to voice my opinion of this decision. On principle I am NOT in agreement with this decision for several reasons: First of all, this last minute notice within our community to have Halloween changed to tommorow. The MAJORITY of parents have made plans for this holiday on the 31st. The reasons vary from decorating to preparing costumes for the kids. It's a date on the calendar that kids countdown to just as they would Christmas. Maybe it's just a day for some, but it's a big deal for the kids. Secondly, the families participating represent the minority of the community yet they can dictate to the majority about when Halloween is celebrated? These families and kids that are participating in this tournament chose to go, the rest of us didn't. A choice, just like the choice of the date for this event. If it was an issue for the participating parents to see thier kid miss Halloween, why didn't they insist on choosing a better date? Last but not least, I am honestly tired of how the communities are so willing to bend over backwards for another sports tournament. Children miss a lot of school because of tournaments (the majority of tournaments are for the adults and thier games). Now we are switching holidays around for them also? I have family members and friends that are "Hockey Parents" and they genuinely want thier child to succeed in a sport, but let's be honest here, these tournaments usually benefit the adults more than the kids. It's a chance to go shopping or to go out partying for some. It is a reality of these tournaments and this kind of attitude about tourneys undermine the sports and it's players. Many can deny it all they want, but you just have to attend these events to see it. There are many places that are known for their devotion to a sport. The key difference is that, it's closely tied to education. You HAVE to have good grades in order to continue on the team. They have one major tournament that attracts scouts for the sport and they display with pride thier players that made it to the big league, or even a prestigious University team. Sadly our communities don't have this. We already have an issue with student success and it's no big surprise when you have it's leaders promoting this further with a change to a holiday... Why don't we close the schools each time there is a tourney somewhere while we are at it? I say this with sarcasm (in case you haven't guessed) because I think the priorities are completly skewed in our communities. I am not against organised sports. I am against the attitudes and behaviour that is tainting what could be a good thing for our communities. We need to prioritize what benefits our kids the most. They need to know they are important. This means tournaments take a back seat to the pleasure your kid may have simply by them donning a costume on and collecting a big bag of candy that will last them well into Novemeber... hopefully. John Abbott College It has been a roller coaster of events lately and obviously it centered around the fact that my eldest is moving away from home and going to school in the big city on her own. I have obviously been emotional about my daughter leaving the nest. It’s a scary thought to know your little bird is going to fly off on her own wings now. No more sheltering and immediate protection from me or her poppa. We spent a few days with her, getting her settled in and giving her plenty of last minute advice on keeping up with her studies, time management, budgeting and all the responsibilities she is so anxious to take on (tsk, tsk, tsk, we all know she is going to regret rushing on that one). We brought her to the campus for orientation and I can certainly say that I felt myself bursting with pride on how she handled herself. She definitely can take care of herself. I feel we did a pretty good job in raising her to be a responsible person. *puffs up chest and snaps her suspenders* Yep, yep, yep. Well, I got to give her credit too. She's way more ambitious than I ever was at that age. She’s way more courageous as well when it comes to handling the responsibilities with being on your own. I myself was such a big baby at that age, wanting my mom or dad to help me all the time. So hats off to you my girl! You are doing a great job and I KNOW you can handle yourself. I see my other daughter will soon follow and be just as independent and ambitious as her big sister. I already hear my son as well, talking about his plans for the future. My husband, during this trip, declared how he was so happy for his daughter and how he can see all of our children doing good and even great things! I certainly agree. My, how time flies and changes. A good advice to go on about change is “One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it’s worth watching.” – Anonymous I know my children will have lives worth watching! I will be watching with great interest. Knowing how proud they already make me, it’s hard to imagine them making me even more proud. Yet, I know they will succeed in doing so. I love them with all my heart. The Creator has blessed me so. Courtesy of Ms ClipArt Yesterday I was understandably worked up about what was going on with my daughter and the poor communication that brought on our dilemma at school. In times like these, it seems completely justifiable and understandable to want to pull your kids out of the school here in our community and head down south “for a better education”. I put those in quotes because what is a better education? I can further expand on this question with follow up questions but then my essay would never end. I will ask one more question instead: Why can’t we, in our Cree communities offer the better education? Instead of the exodus I see here from all the families that put education on the top of their list of important goals for their children, I want to see these same families work hard with our schools to ensure top quality education right here in our own community! It starts with us parents actually working right now with the school and ask “what are you doing to give my child a top quality education?” and better yet follow up with “what can I do as a parent to help make this happen?” Because the hard lesson I am constantly learning from this is that I have my role to play in this as well. I can’t leave it all up to the school. Despite me being done with my own grade/high school career, I am still learning what needs to be done for my own child to complete her career in high school. I’ll admit right here that I sometimes flake because of the exact reason I stated here. You are done with the hardships of grade/high school and you want to put that behind you. The thing to remember is that it is now your child that is going through those same hardships of school and we as parents have the responsibility to help guide them based on our own experiences. Yesterday was a blessing in disguise dealing with a difficult person from the board. It made me realise that it’s worth sticking your neck out and speaking up about things that matter. It’s the only way of getting things done. Allow me to add that speaking up is not the only thing that needs to be done here. It is very easy to stand there, complain and make excuses as to why you didn’t know about the things you are complaining about. Another key component to making a difference is to also be open to listen to what is offered and find a compromise in all of this. Hence the whole premise of this essay; working together. A piece of advice to help tie this all together is that you need to remember that’s it’s ok to admit you don’t know everything and need help. NO one is perfect. Not you, not your child, not the teacher with 25 years of teaching experience and certainly not the administrators with years of experience in education! We all are constantly learning. The wise ones know this already (and I had the fortune of meeting quite a few at the CSB and JBES). The foolish ones like the lady I spoke with yesterday are afraid to admit this and instead antagonize you to avoid such an admission. I am sticking with my community and its schools. I am making the commitment to work with the schools to ensure my kids are getting the best possible education here. That they are being properly prepared by me, the teacher and school for what’s out there after they are done here. I hope the schools and the CSB will work with me as well and with the prompt reply to my complaints about the unfortunate soul who tried to bully me, I think that they are. Isn’t it enough that we all have to make the sacrifices to leave the comfort and security of our community for post-secondary education? Do we really have to do that for our elementary and secondary education as well? They say that “The pen is mightier than the sword”. I am going to put to the test at this moment. I have had an ugly encounter with an administrator at the Cree School Board’s Head office in Mistissini concerning issues with my daughters missing credits this morning. I got to admit, I feel for other parents out there who are not as expressive as me or as vocal as me trying to get information or to inform a person such as this.
I am one of the biggest advocates of getting a proper education and completing your high school. As a parent, I have tried to the best of my abilities to get my kids to do their schooling and to not only pass but, to get good grades. The key part to this, is the fact that I am doing this TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITIES. Part of it is up to my child, the teachers teaching them, the administrators managing and keeping the records of my child’s progress and the School Board to ensure that it is done according to the requirements the Ministry of Education. Today, I realised we, all failed my daughter in some form or another. You see, she is missing her Secondary IV History credits in order to get her diploma. I was told by the teacher, administrator and guidance that she was on the graduate list and that there were some clerical errors to fix. We made arrangements with the teacher and administrators for my daughter to be able to do the extra work to get her missing credits and do TWO history exams to be able to graduate. Yet today, I get a call saying she’s not graduating… Um, What?! That is when I am told to call the head office and talk to the lady who can… I don’t know actually… they never really told me what she could do… only to tell her my dilemma. The Phone Call So I call, I tell her my problem and how no one is at the school yet to help me with sorting out this problem. How can I clear this up when the teacher and guidance are not back from their vacations yet, and the Principal/Vice-Principal that were there last year assisting my girl to get her missing credits, are no longer working at the school? I ended up complaining about this to the lady and how my daughter and I worked hard to ensure she graduates only to come up empty with any assistance locally. I was hoping she could help me find a way to get information. Instead I get her being defensive saying everyone has a right to a vacation (which is not the issue here, I understand that.), then I get antagonized with her saying I should have known this problem was there based on the report cards we received. She was literally yelling at me on the phone and being all aggressive accusing me of not doing anything. I am not the Dali Lama, so I can certainly say that she brought some negative reactions on my part and I responded in kind. I answered her accusations saying that there were a lot of delays in getting her report card and any information about her credits. I was left with the impression that it would be all sorted out by the administration at the school. Then in mid-July, I got my daughter’s incomplete transcripts, I was reassured that she was on the graduate list and that they would sort out the errors. Now all of a sudden, at the last possible minute they tell me she is not graduating because of her sec IV History credits missing. I basically told the lady on the phone that she had no right to talk to me like that and then blame me for the misinformation I received. My daughter and I were given many promises and my daughter jumped through many hoops in order to pass and GRADUATE. The Parent I can easily admit that I should have followed up more on this matter and get on paper the plan to help my daughter in this. I can easily be held accountable for this just like many other parents would be if they were in my shoes. It is only too common to hear that a student has either failed or missing credits to graduate and perhaps the parent should have followed more closely to what was going on. However, even with my previous job working at the school in the library, I was always hearing either by chance, or the last possible minute that my child was missing class a little too often, or not handing in the work or some such thing. My presence at the school made no difference as to how much information I was getting concerning my child and their education. I think many times, thanks to my friendships with some of the teachers, that I was able to get any information at all. I AM NOT ALONE in this. Many parents have faced the exact same problem of only finding out, sometimes too late about some problem concerning their child. WHY IS THAT? Why is it so hard for teachers or administrators to approach a parent to inform them before it becomes too big a problem? The school and its administrators should understand that parents are limited in the knowledge of what is going on at the school with their child. It can account to the fact that our teens are not always forthcoming with information due to either their willingness to share the information or even because like us parents, do not really know what exactly is required of them. The student The lesson my daughter learned from this is that despite her dislike of history, it was a necessary credit for her to graduate. She is learning a hard lesson and it breaks my heart to see her hopes dashed because of all this misinformation. Both my daughter and I know full well that it requires hard work to succeed. I instilled that value in her throughout the past few years. So we were not expecting a handout but a hand up. The teachers The teachers have a tendency of getting a hold of parent only when there is a problem or waiting until grades are in. If they see trouble ahead with their student why can’t teachers notify parents at that point before it becomes a problem? How about telling parent about the successes of their students instead of only the failures? Positive reinforcement is a basic Psych 101 course that most teachers take when going for their Bachelors of Education. How is it that we still see the archaic attitudes of negative reinforcement instead? The Administration - School Level and the Board I get the impression, and I am certain I am not the only one, that administrators, especially thanks to that lady in the head office, think us parents to be all obtuse and don’t know any better. Mind you, I know this is not a fact but it is the reality of how many of us parents feel once we pass through those doors at the school. Perhaps it is because of what I mentioned before, of all that negative reinforcement. Only too often are we parents being contacted because of a problem not because of something good that happened with our child. Perhaps it is because the school takes for granted that the majority of us parents care about our child’s education but don’t have the know how to deal with the school and the school board. Too many times I came to the school to discuss with its administrators a problem concerning my child only to be bombarded with rules and regulations or policies as to why they can’t help me. I distinctly remember interrupting once to say that it is why they are sitting at that desk doing that job and that I am here to get their help to make it work for me and my child. Why is that too much to ask? The recurring problem I see consistently is that the only time to inform the parents about a problem is when it’s too little too late. I would have appreciated a heads up in June about my daughter’s dilemma with her missing credits, so that we could get something done to guarantee her to be sure she’d graduate. Enough is enough We are constantly and consistently told by the school board and the schools as to their dedication to ensure success and increase graduation rates, yet they inadvertently turn around and throw a stick in the wheels of the students that actually want to continue their education after high school. My daughter is seventeen and already knows what she wants to do with her future. She is adamant to go to C.E.G.E.P. and then University. She wants to change the world and contribute by becoming successful and being that role model to her community. She has ambitions that I never had at that age. I’ll say it again, it breaks the heart to tell her that it’s a distinct possibility that she has to put her plans on hold because we were told otherwise and didn’t make the necessary steps like we thought we did for her to graduate. To see her face crumble with disappointment… Ours is not the only story where plans to continue their education has been put on hold due to missing credits, told only at the last possible minute, has happened. I am sure many parents out there in the Cree Nation have their own horror story to tell. Well I started by saying my story to help encourage others to speak up. We NEED to help our kids to move forward in life as much as possible, not hold them back. They already get enough of that already! So let’s start working together for the greater good than trying to avoid blame like that lady I had the misfortune to talk to today. I am willing, Are you? |
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